December 2012
1 post
4 tags
Haiku #148: Friday
I will be home soon
with my girl and food. AND NOW
I’m hungry as fuq
November 2012
4 posts
6 tags
Haiku #147: NaNoWriMo
Close to 40k
WHERE IS MY PLOT? LIFE? SETTING?
They’re in December.
5 tags
Haiku #146: A Dead Turkey's PoV
Gobble gobble bitch
Getcha hand out my dead ass.
Creepy muhfucka
5 tags
Haiku #145: Jelly
Girl I see you here
Writin’ these bamf ass poems
and I am jelly
4 tags
Haiku #144: Eyeliner
The more eye makeup
you put on, the more likely
it is you will cry.
October 2012
2 posts
4 tags
Haiku #143: Minecraft
I’ll just play for like
fifteen minutes… Where did the
last 3 hours go?!
3 tags
Haiku #142: Fucking College
How have things gotten
So fucked up since I came back
Can I call off sick?
July 2012
3 posts
4 tags
Haiku #141: Etsy
Food-shaped necklaces,
Vintage shoes, vegan desserts,
Could this be real life?
3 tags
Haiku #140: Shit to Do
So much shit to do
And it overwhelms me, so
I will take a nap.
3 tags
Haiku #139: The Douchebag Express
People don’t belong
if they’re gonna be douchebags.
“Farewell, planet earth!”
June 2012
2 posts
7 tags
Haiku #138: Sisterhood Everlasting
Did not expect this.
My heart has been torn in two.
WHY SANTORINI?!
5 tags
Haiku #137: Leaving for tour
It’s tomorrow night.
Moment I’ve been waiting for.
So why am I scared?!?
November 2011
1 post
Anonymous asked: Cuppa Cuppa Cake/Bitch, dis be some vegan cake/'Bouta make it soon
October 2011
2 posts
Anonymous asked: Msg me on Yahoo Messenger right now my SN is jonespapasdd121318
4 tags
Haiku #136: The Unit
Most treasured moment?
Seven a.m., girl you cute.
What is love, baby?
September 2011
10 posts
4 tags
Haiku #135: Green Party Headache
WHAT IS YOUR OPINION?!?!?!
Aight I’mma need to leave now.
…My dog is near death.
4 tags
Haiku #134: Collegiate Douchebaggery
Plaid, hipster glasses,
I think it’s bath time, don’t you?
Public Safety, make him GIIIIIIIT.
6 tags
Haiku #133: College Creepers #3 & 4
Threesome or dance rape?
Doesn’t matter in Hillel.
ZOE DON’T WANT YOU.
4 tags
Haiku #132: College Creeper #2
A.M., library.
Fiances? Now broken up.
Girl, are you depressed?
4 tags
Haiku #131: College Creeper #1
Van Meter Highway
Flambini in a top hat
Tryna make some cash
5 tags
Haiku #130: My Gay Husband
You are my husband
Dem titties ain’t good enough
So here’s a GT
8 tags
Haiku #129: Phonephobia
Cute guy from high school
blowin up my phone - really?
4 hours, now talk?
5 tags
Haiku #128: I'm So Fucking Tired
So she held the door.
It doesn’t mean anything,
but she called me doll.
3 tags
Haiku #127: Another College Girl
“I’ll be right back guys”
Goes downstairs, finds barren hall,
Sits alone and cries.
7 tags
Haiku #126: This College Girl
Will you look at me?
…The floor seems interesting.
Won’t pick dare again.
August 2011
18 posts
5 tags
Haiku #125: Miss You
Tianna so fair
Maiden of Goucher Green House
Please come home to me
6 tags
Haiku #124: Last Minute Packing
Toothpaste? Check. Books? Check.
Sanity, though? Not so sure.
Carry my life, please?
5 tags
Haiku #123: Midnight Snack? No, Feast.
Half past eleven.
The family slumbers, a
perfect time for food.
5 tags
Haiku #122: Drarry Party
Guac and fanfiction,
Kate, Bobby, me, Internet.
What could be better?
4 tags
Haiku #121: 8:00am
Alarm goes off. FUCK.
Hit snooze five times. FUCK I’M LATE.
Well, goodbye cruel world.
1 tag
8 tags
Haiku #120: Fangirling Hatred Set Aside When Gold...
I gotta admit,
I really really hate it…
………YOU’RE FOLLOWING ME?!?!
5 tags
Haiku #119: Wisdom Teeth Surgery
Woke up and panicked.
Slept all day, took Vicodin,
Frozen peas on face.
4 tags
Haiku #118: Birthday Party (part 2)
Mad Mex and best friends!
Hopefully no bitches show.
Summer birthdays rule.
4 tags
Haiku #117: Birthday Party
I’m dressed like a bum.
No one will even notice!
Ugh…what is clothing?
5 tags
Haiku #116: The Other Shark Week
Toss and turn in bed
Aching, nauseous misery.
Rather be a man.
5 tags
Haiku #115: New Guitar
The love of my life.
Capo secure, pick in hand.
I could play for hours.
6 tags
Haiku #114: No Sleep
Almost a full day.
Have yet to get some shut eye.
NOW TAKE ME AWAY.
10 tags
Haiku #113: My Mom Is So Weird
Scratching on the door?
Meowing, crawling up stairs?
GIRL YOU ARE HUMAN.
6 tags
Haiku #112: Deterioration
When fish pokes head out
I giggle and coo, “AWWW LOOK!”
Crazy fish lady.
5 tags
Haiku 111: Tattoo.
Ink branded on me.
Won’t come off, it’s there for life.
BUT WHAT DO I WANT.
5 tags
Haiku #110: Cribz
18-car garage.
The walls are made of diamonds.
Lol whats charity?
5 tags
Haiku #109: Jersey Shore
Sam and Ronnie split.
HAWT GUIDOOOOS!!!! Anyone care?
FREE SNOOKI, BITCHES
July 2011
54 posts
7 tags
Haiku #108: People.
Selfish and nasty.
You ain’t no better than me.
Get off your high horse.
5 tags
Haiku #107: Pottermore
Find the Magic Quill!
Many enter, few will win!
Wait til October.
4 tags
Haiku #106: The Best Picture
It’s only because
you used the BEST ONE of me.
HOW COULD YOU RUIN?!
4 tags
Haiku #105: Parselmouthsfan
Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi.
tom Felton is a sex toy.
ginny weasley? Poor.
6 tags
Haiku #104: Stretched Lobes
Painful, not cute, ick.
I don’t get this body mod.
Your ears smell awful.
6 tags
Haiku #104: Copycat
Her skin ain’t thy own.
Tattoos are meant to be yours.
GIIIIIIT away from ink.
7 tags
Haiku #103: Dat. Kili.
Saw the casting list.
IMDB’d that cutie.
SINCE WHEN ARE DWARVES HOT?!
